Week 1

Proverbs 16:9 "A man's heart plans his way,  But the Lord directs his steps."

Reflecting back on the first week of field time, and how everything we did was nothing like we imagined it would have been; it was better. I'm finally learning that the Lord blesses in two ways. He will either bless your plans or He will change them. God sees my heart and every intention and will sometimes have to correct me when my plans don't turn out the way I wanted. I've found that when this happens, the ministry we have done is far more Spirit filled than our original plans. This morning I was listening to the hymn "I Surrender All", and I couldn't help but think of all things I still want control  over in my life. "I surrender all except my own will". Wrong. How can Jesus rule in my life if I won't let Him rule my heart? Even Jesus had to yield to the Father's will. I'm not one who freaks out when things change, but it does freak me out being unprepared for something. This ministry isn't mine to direct or lead. I'm simply to follow what the Lord has asked of me. And that is to bring everything that is set before me back to Jesus. If I'm to be effective in ministry I need Jesus to mold my heart to His will. I can not do anything in my own strength or will. I don't want to go against God, I want to be His faithful servant. I don't want to be a sheep without a shepherd when He is so willing. All of my life I have wanted to feel alive; like I'm fulfilling my life's purpose. Saying, "Yes Lord, I am willing", is the greatest adventure I have ever been on. I look forward to the day I can look back on the now and appreciate all the doors that were closed.

Application: Write down insecurities I want/need to surrender and talk to Maya about these things. She will keep me accountable.

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